In this Montessori Minutes, I share a simple metaphor I created years ago for parent education night called the “ego egg.” It helps explain why “high self-esteem” sounds like the goal, but by itself it doesn’t automatically lead to long-term success or resilience. There is research linking high self-esteem to lower incidences of eating disorders, but we’ve also learned that simply believing you’re great doesn’t guarantee better outcomes in life. So I use the egg image to show what actually makes self-esteem last. In the first egg, high self-esteem is like a strong shell with real substance inside: confidence, independence, and resilience. In Montessori, I build that by treating toddlers as competent, giving them real skills, and letting them master themselves and their environment. In the second egg, you still see “high self-esteem,” but there’s no ability inside—just an empty shell built mostly on outside praise. That kind of self-esteem can be fragile, easily shaken when the “good job!” disappears. My takeaway: help your toddler earn their confidence through meaningful work and real mastery, so their self-esteem is sturdy, not performative.