I’m back with a petty storytime because my blood still boils thinking about it. In this video, I’m talking about two of the biggest Toronto fucboi experiences I’ve ever dealt with—aka the kind of chaos where you’re just sitting there like… damn girl, you wild for even entertaining this. I don’t say names, but if the shoe fits, wear it. First, there’s “Eric” from North York—someone I matched with on Tinder in 2016, but I recognized him because he had the exact same awkward profile pics from years earlier. The clingy good morning/good night energy was already weird, but the real plot twist was finding out he’d had a girlfriend since 2015 while still living on Tinder for years. Then we get into “Joe,” the older guy my Starbucks friend tried to set me up with—late pickups, rude-to-service-workers behavior, and the audacity to brag that I was “chasing” him. I literally pull receipts (screenshots) showing him asking me out over and over while I’m making excuses. Moral of the story: trust your gut, be nice to service people, and don’t rewrite history when there are screenshots.